Climbing The Ladder Beyond the Panorama January 25, 2022

Climbing The Ladder

Written by Nandini Sethi

I’m awake, 

I’m out of bed,

Scrambling, crawling, pacing, 

To get somewhere, 

I don’t want to go. 

I go as fast as my stubby legs will carry me, 

Quick, but not as rapid as the thoughts running through my mind,

That has no right to be here.

They have no right to be spoken,

Or to be heard,

They have the right to remain silent,

And stay curt. 

I knot my tie, comb my balding head, 

And tell myself, ‘it’s just the stress.’ 

I jump on the train, the last one to make it,

Everyone hiding little giggles, watching the doors close on my face. 

I let it slide, there’s an important meeting today,

Which decides my life, my fate, my tomorrow. 

It has to be worth the blaring alarm clocks, the cold showers, the long train rides,

I know, I know it will be worth it. 

I run out the train, into the roads, breathlessly pacing to get there in time,

One glance at my flimsy watch tells me I don’t have much of it. 

I slam into the glass doors, I forgot to open them, 

And waltz right into the conference room. 

The one with the conference in it. 

The one that decides my future. 

The one that I woke up at 5:00 AM for. 

The one I slammed into glass and train doors for. 

The one that was supposed to start in 30 seconds. 

But it didn’t. 

It was only forty minutes later, the first sliver of civilization began to infiltrate,

To decide my future, my tomorrow. 

I am well aware, I am climbing up the ladder,

That leads to nowhere. 

Nandini Sethi
Nandini Sethi

Sometimes dolefully insightful, sometimes plain distressed state of mind, but always love. I think there’s a bit of love in everything we write.

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