It’s here. It’s finally here, the season we’ve all been waiting for: IPL! From laughs and cheers to tears and slurs, the excitement never ceases and our spirits constantly remain high; is there even a moment you look away from the crease? But this year, we’re switching things up a bit.
We’re taking the fun beyond the pitch, where the rivalries continue even off the grounds, and the spirit of teamwork and loyalty continues to strive. Meet our representatives who are here to defend their teams in the epic diss battles this season.
“Bhai, aaj ka kya scene?”
You know the words. You know the tone. Resident bad boy Vicky will ask you the scene, and then ultimately tell you the scene- 1) momos 2) long drive pe chal 3) pick a fight with any random person he finds on the road. He will carry on the rage and (borderline) offensive jokes to the game where he will roast you like chicken on the tandoor (his favourite).
Basu may look sweet like a roshogulla, but once he puts on his monkey cap and his thick black frames, he’s ready to throw hands. With his complicated, intellectual terminology, the insults almost sound poetic, but don’t be fooled- those beautifully woven words are only metaphoric, and once you comprehend the meaning- they sting like spicy puchkaa.
A chhole bhature fanatic and Daler Mehendi worshipper, Jolly spends about 80% of his day tending to fertilizing the crops, and the remaining 20% talking to his paaji.
You don’t want to mess with him because if you do, he will have a jolly good time serving you in an epic diss battle.
From the land of Maharajas, Pratap welcomes everyone with open arms and will make your royal life dreams come true.
However, it is in his ‘parampara’ to stand up for his brothers and sisters. Mess with his people and the words from his mouth will sound like the swish of a sword through the air.
In addition to screaming “ee saala cup namde” year after year, one other thing Sid has not given up on over the years is on his passion for software engineering. (Silicon Valley, represent!)
For someone who sits through Bangalore traffic every single day, thrashing someone in an internet battle is a piece of cake. And a means of passing time while waiting in the traffic.
Shiva’s favorite thing (after soft, fluffy idlis with spicy sambar) is yelling insults at all CSK haters. He is not afraid of anything, and will not hesitate even for a second to diss you, and bring forth the Dhoni card when getting dissed. Whatever the result at the end of the day, his ultimate weapon will always exasperate you, then stick with you for the rest of the week- whistle podu.
Besides flaunting his new watch and swanky new car, Sunny enjoys going to South Bombay to eat sushi and drink cosmos. He may be a newbie in his ad agency but he is a boss on the field. Will he able to defend the honour of the land of film stars, the glory of vada paavs, and the dignity of SoBo brats?
Totally complying with the stereotype, Venky lives, eats, breathes biryani. In fact, he is biryani personified: spicy and sassy, especially when it comes to his mustache and his team. And when it does come down to that, just remember that Hyderabadi Hindi is not famous for no reason. Game on.
The ultimate rivalries are here! Join the fun:
