Utopia

Away from my grandmother’s house, 

into the forests that envelop it, 

I walk on, slipping on moss 

stepping on creepers,

avoiding the itchy plant I cannot name

almost walking into a banana shoot. 

I walk on, not knowing where I want to be. 

I stop suddenly

for in the middle, I see 

a large, empty meadow with 

soft looking baby pink flowers

empty, save for chirping birds and noisy insects.

suddenly feeling like a foreigner, I want to walk away.

I want to but I fail. 

Unsure of what to name the tugging in my chest, 

I stagger towards the meadow 

feeling my knees give out.

kneeling in the middle of the meadow, 

comfort, I breathe out, 

touching my forehead to the ground 

comfort, I repeat, letting the word fall softly from my lips 

comfort, like a mother’s loving embrace,

like a friend’s knowing glance, 

warmth, that brings forth tears. 

The meadow cradles me, 

rocking my sobbing self back and forth; 

I’m her child for many hours. 

Walking back, unaware of my way out,

I’m at ease somehow, 

without a care about where I place my feet

slipping and stumbling again, 

I’m home, I whisper, beaming, 

feeling lighter than I’ve felt in forever 

wanting to hold onto that feeling

refusing to leave, to let go. 

joy, knowing that this green escape 

is my secret paradise. 

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